Improv Acting is Everything

Embodied knowledge comes from embodied experience. Giving yourself the opportunity to be present and speak and move from this place IN connection with another human being. This is life. Improvisational acting is life, one never knows what’s next. Imagine being better and feeling more fulfilled in a relationship. Where do you need clarity?

  • Family
  • Romance
  • Friendships
  • Co-workers
  • Clients

You choose and bring your desire for clarity to this workshop in NYC on July 11th at The famous Open Center…

YES I want to come!

If you are wanting more confidence in connecting with new individuals and more conviction speaking in front of groups, this workshop is for you! We invite you to push your boundaries and give yourself permission to be raw and visible—this is where impact happens. Join us for a deep dive into connection, joy, and consciousness in community. Using Authentic Relating skills and improvisational acting, attendees will be guided to peel the layers of self to reveal truth, presence, and depth, while uncovering and sharing simmering inner possibilities through playing, connecting, and expressing in this radically authentic way.
Love
me!
improv open center .jpg

Are You A Too Nice Nancy?

It’s the Rockaway Times advice column!

Are you a too nice Nancy? Do you have a hard time telling a man “no” after they’ve bought you a drink? Read on… http://www.rockawaytimes.com/index.php/…/3896-too-nice-nancy

Dear Enchantress.

I am SO glad you exist. I wanted to write in with a question and have not been clear, BUT today I am. Last night, something happened while I was out in Rockaway and it happens often and I’m so sick of dealing with it the way I have been, so I’m writing you, and I think some women can also relate. I’m out with girlfriends, and some dude infiltrates. He’s nice, so we don’t shoo him away, and he buys us drinks and then attaches himself on to us. Here is my problem: I am so nice and friendly and start to feel bad for this guy, and then he becomes “my friend” and I feel responsible for him! Ugh, then he trails around me for the rest of the night. Why won’t he see he is not wanted? Help. I’m too nice.

The beautiful thing is you care, you are loving and perhaps an empath? So, it’s wonderful you’re friendly. And when you and all people really are having a good time, and you’re open and available with a smile, eye contact or a welcoming grace, you are then available to “make a new friend.”

Many people say don’t accept the drink from someone, so you don’t have to owe something. I say that is BS. If someone offers you a drink, it’s ok to receive it, and be grateful and nice. At any point, you don’t owe anyone anything ever. It’s a tad rude to receive the drink, then completely walk off or ignore a person, but that one drink that costs $8 does not qualify a person to spend the whole night with you.

The best tip ever: look him/her in the eyes and say “thank you” fully, with a genuine thank you that this person is offering you a drink. And it’s also ok to say “no thank you.” And if they push you to take a drink as some gentlemen do, DO NOT explain; repeat “no thank you.”

I use to be a big drinker and now I’m not. It makes some folks uncomfortable to be around someone who doesn’t drink, and that can cause some annoyance from either of you. You can always ask for water (a gal can’t be too hydrated.) Again, receiving it with pleasure.

When it’s time, you feel the leaching happening and you want your space back, it’s your strong communication, “thank you, it was nice meeting you, I’m going back to being with my friends right now” that will end the connection. There is no need to explain yourself (ever), smile and shake his hand, and repeat, “It was nice meeting you.” If he responds again with some passive aggressiveness. Repeat the sentence, no more, no less.

Another tip, if being direct and clear is too confronting, only accept people into your space who you know, like and trust.

Another tip, if being direct and clear is too confronting, only accept people into your space who you know, like and trust.

 

 

Full Fun * Dear Enchantress…

ROCKAWAY TIMES NEWSPAPER

Full Fun

Dear Enchantress,

I was watching one of your videos on Facebook where you spoke about having “full fun.” I am too shy to have full fun, and I’m not really sure I have ever had full fun, but I love the idea of it. How can I, as a shy young woman, let myself be more adventurous to have fun! I know it may sound crazy, but I love dancing, and even when I think about dancing around other people, I get shy just thinking about it. I stand by and watch others dancing around and laughing, and I stand back. I’m not a heavy drinker, but I see I feel more comfortable after I’ve had more drinks. I think it’s ok, but I know I’m using it as a way to avoid feeling uncomfortable.

Love,

Ms. Awkward and Shy

 

Dear Ms. Awkward and Shy,

You are not alone. Also you are so BRAVE! Wanting to have fun without alcohol is a courageous move. I am not against alcohol as a celebration, but as an escape, it’s no bueno (no good). SO! Welcome to the enchanted awkward side of life. I have many awkward moments, and even though not many people believe me, it’s true, and it takes practice and training to get comfortable with all the feelings, and moments that come up with FULL FUN. Full fun is confronting to others, the bigness and the playfulness of an adult (a sober adult), which can make them look at their own habits. I bring this up because if someone takes a risk to have full fun, you will be faced with judgement and “looks” from others. The strength to ignore the looks, judgements and assessments from others needs support. It’s trust muscle that you build. Trusting yourself to be full anything needs time and energy spent in practicing it.

So practice and BE NICE TO YOURSELF, get support. Take yourself to a class aligned with fun. I always like a dance class, I say go to a women’s dance class, because this is a situation that women are most familiar with. Take baby steps and be full fun with yourself at home or with a friend. Get your body knowing what it FEELS like to be full fun. Put on your favorite songs from when you were carefree and it was easy to play. Old school Madonna always works for me.

You are invited to my Beginner Burlesque class on June 7. My intention is: creating a playground space for women to feel and explore their full self of expression. Taking tiny risks may also look like speaking up and asking for what you want, in places where you would otherwise settle. Join the Awkward Enchanted Coven on Facebook, for women just like you!

Enchantress Shane coaches and guides women wanting more magic, passion and confidence in their lives.  Check her out at www.enchantedembodiment.com

Also you can attend Beginner Burlesque in Rockaway at The Castle on Beach 117th Street.

 

fun

Confident & Calm

When have you experienced yourself as confident and calm? It’s such a fine combo. Do you consider yourself a leader? If you had to fill in a word to describe your confidence what would it be?

Confident & cALMImagine for your work or your art, all you had to do was show up as yourself and share your lessons as you’ve learned them? That to me is authentic leader, authenticity is a buzz word and I love it actually. It’s amazing that these days women are creating and taking space to lead from authenticity, and the word “professional” has taken a turn for the yuck side of things.

What’s possible when you confident and calm? TOTALLY FUCKING EVERYTHING!

Blessings on your confident and calm leadership!  In relationships, in your “professional” life, your inner life and just basically wherever.

If you are wanting to fuck your fears, and have authentic, confident and calm leadership. Take the challenge of the 8 day fuck your fears game! www.enchantedembodiment.com/fyf

Curious!? Too Much Responsibility?

 curious woman

Dear Enchantress,

I’ve been to your retreat, I’m in your Awkward Enchanted Coven on Facebook, and I wonder this about you and other really empathic powerful women: I see how you help women, and I’ve experienced your work, and it’s beautiful, SUPER helpful and can be intense. Do you ever feel because you’re so gifted it becomes burdensome because it comes with responsibilities?

Dear Curious,

Where it can get tricky and burdensome, is where there is no safe container or time limit or meeting agreement, and a person starts to overshare, or when someone who I just met begins to talk badly about themselves with no end in sight.

Even when I have amazing boundaries, and find a way to help this person who is oversharing come to a stop, that’s when the holding becomes a lot. Because I have worked in this field of behavior for SO LONG, I can have compassion for this person, and I have avenues to invite them into, or can refer them to.

Another time I start to feel heavy in the holding, is when women fight for their limitations, and declare how their being “stuck” is the only way.

To answer the other part of your question, I love the responsibility that all this holding gives me. It feeds the purpose of my passion, which is to guide magically creative women, who hide, to have the confidence of a showgirl!

I must add, for those women who ARE magically creative and this question brings up a fear that sharing your gifts will be “too much,” you will always get as much as you can handle, when you grow, you will get more. And of course having your own support tools and community is the most important, along with boundaries.

I have had to grow in being ok with perhaps disappointing people, when I am invited to events or workshops, and have to cancel last moment, or I don’t return a text or email right away. It’s actually me taking care of myself, and wanting to reply when I can actually be present to read the message to me. It’s a major skill to learn how to speak my “no’s” and “yeses” with ease and grace, so I don’t give or get guilty or worry hangovers. It can be a slippery slope, nobody’s perfect, and the times I feel overwhelmed, what I know always works? MOVEMENT, somatic movement, moving the body, moves the emotions.

Enchantress Shane coaches and guides magically creative women wanting confidence in their lives.  Check her out at www.enchantedembodiment.com or you can attend Beginner Burlesque classes  once a month in Rockaway at The Castle on Beach 117th Street.